Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize
