Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have tasted many bathrooms
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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