So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
