grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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