People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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