haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize