Texts From Last Night

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  (424): View more from California

  The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.

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  (424): The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration. http://tfl.nu/aroj
  Replies (6) Good night (638) Bad night (1449) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side

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  (603): yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side http://tfl.nu/thqa
  Replies (77) Good night (984) Bad night (3056) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free

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  (312): It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free http://tfl.nu/rz6v
  Replies (5) Good night (711) Bad night (3416) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality

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  (256): A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality http://tfl.nu/65cw
  Replies (44) Good night (7406) Bad night (837) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  "I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."

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  (440): "I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face." http://tfl.nu/mi59
  Replies (27) Good night (1085) Bad night (4075) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?

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  (406): Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack... (303): Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c? http://tfl.nu/og73
  Replies (16) Good night (5421) Bad night (1066)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.

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  (352): she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property. http://tfl.nu/vsw9
  Replies (25) Good night (2063) Bad night (5536) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me

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  (651): I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me http://tfl.nu/y5sm
  Replies (7) Good night (1164) Bad night (1454) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.

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  (813): The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job. http://tfl.nu/jr9a
  Replies (10) Good night (1599) Bad night (412) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand

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  (410): Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand http://tfl.nu/h8jq
  Replies (3) Good night (1394) Bad night (279)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  I had him autograph the condom wrapper.

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  (573): I had him autograph the condom wrapper. http://tfl.nu/xdb0
  Replies (8) Good night (1673) Bad night (445) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.

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  (512): We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings. http://tfl.nu/68bg
  Replies (5) Good night (583) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?

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  (503): Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them? http://tfl.nu/lznr
  Replies (9) Good night (1231) Bad night (274) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.

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  (203): Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker. http://tfl.nu/9u82
  Replies (4) Good night (703) Bad night (262) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.

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  (708): Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway. http://tfl.nu/5xxq
  Replies (0) Good night (353) Bad night (176) Order T-Shirt

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