i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
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I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
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Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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