She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
