Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize