Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
