We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
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