bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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