I could have mohawked her pubes.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
