hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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