So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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