he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
