At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
