When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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