She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
