Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.