i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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