My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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