I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Ladies don't puke and tell
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