my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
The adults are the big ones right?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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