For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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