God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I am one with the molecules
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
