in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Randomize
