i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
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