my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize