As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
