But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
