Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
