Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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