I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
