The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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