I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
