You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
