I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
