This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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