next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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