Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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