They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
