Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
