just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
