Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
