Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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