xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
