Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Houston, we have a squirter
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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