It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
There are leaves in my underwear?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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